1
00:00:03,385 --> 00:00:05,820
[?]

2
00:00:16,532 --> 00:00:17,949
Respiration,

3
00:00:17,950 --> 00:00:21,236
pulse rate, heartbeat...

4
00:00:21,237 --> 00:00:22,477
all excellent.

5
00:00:23,639 --> 00:00:24,905
Gentlemen...

6
00:00:24,906 --> 00:00:26,707
you have just qualified

7
00:00:26,708 --> 00:00:28,743
to participate as guinea pigs

8
00:00:28,744 --> 00:00:30,311
in an experimental program.

9
00:00:30,312 --> 00:00:31,546
Congratulations.

10
00:00:31,547 --> 00:00:33,348
Guinea pig? What kind
of guinea pig, sir?

11
00:00:33,349 --> 00:00:35,150
Oh, you'll see.

12
00:00:35,151 --> 00:00:36,584
And now, if you'll excuse me,

13
00:00:36,585 --> 00:00:37,585
I, um...

14
00:00:37,586 --> 00:00:39,354
I must inform Commander Kiski,

15
00:00:39,355 --> 00:00:42,056
the director of the new program,
that you're ready to begin.

16
00:00:42,057 --> 00:00:43,458
Now?
Now, major.

17
00:00:43,459 --> 00:00:45,260
But a-all the guys
just went to lunch, sir.

18
00:00:45,261 --> 00:00:47,195
And until I return,
I suggest that

19
00:00:47,196 --> 00:00:49,197
you both exercise vigorously.

20
00:00:49,198 --> 00:00:51,533
Commander Kiski likes
his guinea pigs to be warmed up.

21
00:00:53,235 --> 00:00:55,870
Boy, for a few knee bends,
we have to miss lunch.

22
00:00:55,871 --> 00:00:56,871
I hope this Kiski isn't

23
00:00:56,872 --> 00:00:58,640
some kind of
an exercise fanatic.

24
00:00:58,641 --> 00:01:00,041
Well. I wouldn't
worry about it.

25
00:01:00,042 --> 00:01:01,376
We're in pretty good shape.

26
00:01:01,377 --> 00:01:03,878
Think we can breeze through
anything this guy throws at us,

27
00:01:03,879 --> 00:01:05,863
unless he's Attila the Hun.
Huh? [BOTH LAUGH]

28
00:01:05,864 --> 00:01:07,898
[LAUGHS]

29
00:01:07,899 --> 00:01:09,300
Oh, what are you
doing here, huh?

30
00:01:09,301 --> 00:01:10,701
Oh, master, do you not remember?

31
00:01:10,702 --> 00:01:12,103
You and Major Healey promised to

32
00:01:12,104 --> 00:01:13,404
take me out to dinner tonight.

33
00:01:13,405 --> 00:01:15,006
Oh, no.
I forgot about that.

34
00:01:15,007 --> 00:01:16,040
And dancing.
Ohh!

35
00:01:16,041 --> 00:01:17,041
[CLAPS]

36
00:01:17,042 --> 00:01:18,042
Do you like my dress?

37
00:01:18,043 --> 00:01:19,210
Yeah, it's pretty, but...

38
00:01:19,211 --> 00:01:20,911
But, but, but.
Yeah, yeah, it's great.

39
00:01:20,912 --> 00:01:23,115
Jeannie, will you get out
of here? We gotta work out.

40
00:01:23,116 --> 00:01:24,983
What is "work out"?

41
00:01:24,984 --> 00:01:26,518
Well, it's a lot of
running and jumping,

42
00:01:26,519 --> 00:01:27,719
bending and stretching.

43
00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:28,953
But if you do all that,

44
00:01:28,954 --> 00:01:31,289
will you not be too tired
to take me dancing tonight?

45
00:01:32,241 --> 00:01:34,326
No, no. Listen,
we could chop rocks all day

46
00:01:34,327 --> 00:01:36,127
and still be in good shape
to take you out.

47
00:01:36,128 --> 00:01:37,311
Now go on.
Go on home, please.

48
00:01:37,312 --> 00:01:39,381
You are sure
you will not be too tired?

49
00:01:39,382 --> 00:01:40,931
Absolutely.
Please, will you?

50
00:01:40,932 --> 00:01:43,134
Very well then.
Until tonight.

51
00:01:43,135 --> 00:01:44,135
Yeah, sure.
Tonight.

52
00:01:44,136 --> 00:01:45,386
Okay.

53
00:01:45,387 --> 00:01:46,471
Excuse me, gentlemen.

54
00:01:46,472 --> 00:01:48,340
Oh. Yes, sir.
Hello.

55
00:01:48,341 --> 00:01:49,641
Uh, this is the director of

56
00:01:49,642 --> 00:01:52,310
your new physical-conditioning program.
[CHUCKLES]

57
00:01:52,311 --> 00:01:53,945
Commander Frances
N. Kiski.

58
00:01:53,946 --> 00:01:55,279
Major Nelson, Major Healey.

59
00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:57,149
How do you do, sir?
How are you, sir?

60
00:01:57,150 --> 00:01:58,430
Attention!

61
00:01:59,218 --> 00:02:01,068
[?]

62
00:02:07,159 --> 00:02:08,626
Marshmallows.

63
00:02:09,662 --> 00:02:10,979
It's Attila the Hun.

64
00:02:17,403 --> 00:02:19,170
[?]

65
00:03:04,283 --> 00:03:05,800
[?]

66
00:03:11,523 --> 00:03:12,606
Major...

67
00:03:12,607 --> 00:03:14,675
are you in good condition?

68
00:03:14,676 --> 00:03:15,916
Yes, sir.
Wrong!

69
00:03:17,512 --> 00:03:19,147
And you.

70
00:03:19,148 --> 00:03:20,681
Wall-to-wall flab.

71
00:03:21,783 --> 00:03:24,085
What do you say to
50 quick pushups?

72
00:03:24,086 --> 00:03:26,721
Or are you afraid
you might hurt yourself?

73
00:03:26,722 --> 00:03:28,022
If you are...

74
00:03:28,023 --> 00:03:30,524
just speak right up.

75
00:03:30,525 --> 00:03:31,625
Oh-ho-ho...

76
00:03:31,626 --> 00:03:34,696
Too easy, huh?
All right.

77
00:03:34,697 --> 00:03:35,930
We'll try something else.

78
00:03:37,032 --> 00:03:40,068
Now, watch.
Watch my hand.

79
00:03:40,069 --> 00:03:42,170
Watch.

80
00:03:42,171 --> 00:03:43,404
[GRUNTS, YELLS]

81
00:03:45,307 --> 00:03:46,307
See what I mean?

82
00:03:46,308 --> 00:03:48,343
See what I did?

83
00:03:48,344 --> 00:03:49,744
Well... you saw it.

84
00:03:49,745 --> 00:03:51,012
You're dead.

85
00:03:51,013 --> 00:03:53,681
I just killed you, and
you didn't defend yourselves.

86
00:03:54,917 --> 00:03:56,284
Well, we're at attention, sir.

87
00:03:56,285 --> 00:03:57,852
[MOCKINGLY]
"At attention, sir."

88
00:03:57,853 --> 00:03:59,553
Oh, really? Hm.

89
00:03:59,554 --> 00:04:00,855
See what I mean,
Dr. Bellows?

90
00:04:00,856 --> 00:04:02,340
Proved my point.

91
00:04:03,509 --> 00:04:06,678
These men are
survival-soft.

92
00:04:06,679 --> 00:04:08,145
Their animal instinct...

93
00:04:08,146 --> 00:04:11,916
of kill or be killed...

94
00:04:11,917 --> 00:04:13,451
has been ruined...

95
00:04:13,452 --> 00:04:15,152
by their easy living.

96
00:04:15,153 --> 00:04:16,487
Hm.

97
00:04:16,488 --> 00:04:18,723
We've received the finest
astronaut training, sir.

98
00:04:18,724 --> 00:04:19,774
I think that, uh...

99
00:04:19,775 --> 00:04:21,342
Kindergarten junk!

100
00:04:21,343 --> 00:04:23,377
That's right.

101
00:04:23,378 --> 00:04:24,829
I...

102
00:04:24,830 --> 00:04:27,081
I am gonna teach you
how to survive.

103
00:04:28,150 --> 00:04:30,552
Punishment training.

104
00:04:30,553 --> 00:04:31,719
Pain! Pain!

105
00:04:33,088 --> 00:04:34,956
Pain, going past suffering...

106
00:04:35,958 --> 00:04:37,759
into the valley of agony.

107
00:04:38,961 --> 00:04:39,961
That's right.

108
00:04:43,498 --> 00:04:44,566
Now, what do you say

109
00:04:44,567 --> 00:04:47,702
to a quick
10-mile run?

110
00:04:47,703 --> 00:04:49,804
And after that, you'll
come back here,

111
00:04:49,805 --> 00:04:51,138
and we'll have three hours

112
00:04:51,139 --> 00:04:53,441
of special exercises.

113
00:04:53,442 --> 00:04:56,878
A... A 10-mile run
and three hours, sir?

114
00:04:56,879 --> 00:04:58,212
That's right, major.

115
00:04:58,213 --> 00:04:59,681
That's right.

116
00:04:59,682 --> 00:05:01,983
And tomorrow...
[LAUGHS]

117
00:05:01,984 --> 00:05:03,618
We'll start the hard stuff.

118
00:05:05,387 --> 00:05:06,387
Okay?

119
00:05:06,388 --> 00:05:07,589
Right face!

120
00:05:08,958 --> 00:05:10,524
Double-quick...
march!

121
00:05:10,525 --> 00:05:11,643
Move it, move it, move it!

122
00:05:11,644 --> 00:05:12,694
[BLOWS WHISTLE]

123
00:05:12,695 --> 00:05:14,161
Move it, move it,
move it, move it!

124
00:05:14,162 --> 00:05:16,263
Move it, move it, move it!

125
00:05:21,687 --> 00:05:23,487
He's trying to kill us.
Yeah.

126
00:05:23,488 --> 00:05:24,488
Healey!

127
00:05:24,489 --> 00:05:25,724
Yeah?

128
00:05:27,392 --> 00:05:29,227
Oh, okay. Time.

129
00:05:29,228 --> 00:05:30,309
[BLOWS WHISTLE]

130
00:05:31,964 --> 00:05:33,098
[GROANS]

131
00:05:36,301 --> 00:05:37,301
He's trying to kill us.

132
00:05:37,302 --> 00:05:38,502
Kill us? See it in his eyes.

133
00:05:38,503 --> 00:05:40,105
He was testing us.
Trying to kill us.

134
00:05:40,106 --> 00:05:41,472
But he couldn't break us down.

135
00:05:41,473 --> 00:05:43,307
We won, don't you see?
Yeah.

136
00:05:43,308 --> 00:05:44,408
Oh, that's good.

137
00:05:44,409 --> 00:05:46,444
Ten minutes ago,
I thought I died.

138
00:05:46,445 --> 00:05:47,725
Let's get out of here.

139
00:05:49,215 --> 00:05:51,082
Where are you going?

140
00:05:51,083 --> 00:05:53,051
[GASPS] Who said school was out?

141
00:05:53,052 --> 00:05:54,318
Oh, well, sir, you said...

142
00:05:54,319 --> 00:05:56,621
You said we could leave
after three hours of exercise.

143
00:05:56,622 --> 00:05:59,257
I lied! I tell that
to all my boys

144
00:05:59,258 --> 00:06:01,525
to keep them
on their tippy-tippy-toes.

145
00:06:01,526 --> 00:06:02,526
You're not through yet.

146
00:06:02,527 --> 00:06:05,230
Here. Try these on.

147
00:06:05,231 --> 00:06:06,471
[SIGHS]

148
00:06:11,937 --> 00:06:14,172
I think there's a mistake.

149
00:06:14,173 --> 00:06:16,340
Somebody, uh, put lead
in the pockets.

150
00:06:16,341 --> 00:06:17,541
[LAUGHS] It's a mistake.

151
00:06:17,542 --> 00:06:18,843
There's lead in the pockets.

152
00:06:18,844 --> 00:06:20,111
No, major.

153
00:06:20,112 --> 00:06:21,746
It's not lead.

154
00:06:21,747 --> 00:06:23,148
It's sand.

155
00:06:23,149 --> 00:06:25,200
A hundred and fifty
pounds of sand

156
00:06:25,201 --> 00:06:27,118
sewn into the lining
of each jacket.

157
00:06:28,204 --> 00:06:30,088
Oh, you look marvelous.

158
00:06:30,089 --> 00:06:32,022
What do we do
with these sand dunes

159
00:06:32,023 --> 00:06:33,458
now that we got 'em on?

160
00:06:33,459 --> 00:06:36,961
What do you think you do with
150 pounds of sand on your back?

161
00:06:36,962 --> 00:06:39,798
Run.
Uphill.

162
00:06:39,799 --> 00:06:42,466
Now, move!
Move, move!

163
00:06:42,467 --> 00:06:43,467
[BLOWS
WHISTLE]

164
00:06:43,468 --> 00:06:45,236
Move it, move it, move it!

165
00:06:45,237 --> 00:06:47,305
Let's go!
Let's move it!

166
00:06:54,596 --> 00:06:55,596
Oh, master.

167
00:06:55,597 --> 00:06:57,899
[GIGGLES] And Major Healey.

168
00:06:57,900 --> 00:07:00,168
I almost thought you had
forgotten our date tonight.

169
00:07:00,169 --> 00:07:02,003
You are very late.

170
00:07:02,004 --> 00:07:03,471
You promised.
I know.

171
00:07:03,472 --> 00:07:05,840
Jeannie, I'd love to take you
for, uh, d-dancing, but...

172
00:07:05,841 --> 00:07:07,481
Oh, thank you!
No.

173
00:07:08,861 --> 00:07:09,861
[GROANS]

174
00:07:11,163 --> 00:07:12,843
What...?
What happened?

175
00:07:14,033 --> 00:07:15,466
You may not believe this, Roger,

176
00:07:15,467 --> 00:07:16,901
but I think we're going dancing.

177
00:07:16,902 --> 00:07:18,903
Yes. Come along.
Let's go.

178
00:07:18,904 --> 00:07:20,071
Oh, wait.
Oh, oh-oh...

179
00:07:20,072 --> 00:07:21,072
Come on.
[LAUGHS]

180
00:07:22,107 --> 00:07:23,607
Whoa, no.

181
00:07:23,608 --> 00:07:25,609
[?]

182
00:07:30,816 --> 00:07:32,616
Oh, this is such fun.

183
00:07:32,617 --> 00:07:34,937
Are you enjoying yourself,
Major Healey?

184
00:07:36,488 --> 00:07:39,090
Major Healey? Are you
enjoying yourself?

185
00:07:39,091 --> 00:07:41,826
Yes, I'm enjoying myself.
Oh.

186
00:07:41,827 --> 00:07:44,195
Well, I-if you are
too tired, we can go home.

187
00:07:44,196 --> 00:07:46,497
No, I'm not too tired.
I-I w... I don't want to go home.

188
00:07:46,498 --> 00:07:47,765
[GIGGLES]

189
00:07:49,101 --> 00:07:50,101
Master?

190
00:07:50,102 --> 00:07:52,136
Master, wake up.

191
00:07:52,137 --> 00:07:53,537
Oh. He's asleep.

192
00:07:53,538 --> 00:07:55,298
Master, wake up.
Wake up.

193
00:07:56,641 --> 00:07:58,401
Master.
[GIGGLES]

194
00:07:59,078 --> 00:08:00,879
Peekaboo.

195
00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:02,160
Wake up.

196
00:08:10,655 --> 00:08:12,190
Thank you, Armand.

197
00:08:12,191 --> 00:08:14,725
I think you'll like
this place, commander.

198
00:08:14,726 --> 00:08:16,427
The, uh, music's a bit
on the loud side,

199
00:08:16,428 --> 00:08:18,496
but the food is superb.
Hm.

200
00:08:18,497 --> 00:08:20,431
Good. After
breaking down the men,

201
00:08:20,432 --> 00:08:21,665
I always have a good appetite.

202
00:08:23,785 --> 00:08:25,745
Wake up. Wake up.
[GROANS]

203
00:08:30,910 --> 00:08:32,460
[?]

204
00:08:45,274 --> 00:08:46,574
Look who's here.

205
00:08:50,145 --> 00:08:52,113
He's dancing.

206
00:08:52,114 --> 00:08:54,648
That's incredible.

207
00:08:54,649 --> 00:08:56,317
It's fabulous, doc.

208
00:08:56,318 --> 00:08:58,519
You know, I've had to
hold up my training program,

209
00:08:58,520 --> 00:08:59,620
because I couldn't get men

210
00:08:59,621 --> 00:09:02,123
strong enough to get
the full treatment.

211
00:09:02,124 --> 00:09:04,158
But with Nelson and Healey,

212
00:09:04,159 --> 00:09:07,194
starting tomorrow, I'll
be able to give them the works.

213
00:09:07,195 --> 00:09:08,729
The works?

214
00:09:08,730 --> 00:09:10,531
Everything.

215
00:09:10,532 --> 00:09:11,865
My secret plan.

216
00:09:22,844 --> 00:09:24,445
Oh, master,
you should have told me

217
00:09:24,446 --> 00:09:26,447
that Commander Kiski
made you work out so hard.

218
00:09:26,448 --> 00:09:27,748
Ahh! Mm.

219
00:09:27,749 --> 00:09:30,117
I would not have allowed you
to go dancing. [GROANS]

220
00:09:30,118 --> 00:09:31,885
The dancing was the easy part.

221
00:09:31,886 --> 00:09:34,121
I slept through most of that.

222
00:09:34,122 --> 00:09:36,123
Do you suppose it's possible
to sprain skin?

223
00:09:36,124 --> 00:09:37,425
Ohh!

224
00:09:37,426 --> 00:09:38,792
Oh.

225
00:09:38,793 --> 00:09:40,561
Well, let's hobble along

226
00:09:40,562 --> 00:09:41,995
with another day
of fun and games

227
00:09:41,996 --> 00:09:43,197
with Killer Kiski.

228
00:09:43,198 --> 00:09:44,798
Oh, but he will hurt you again.

229
00:09:44,799 --> 00:09:47,134
Ah, no, no. He won't be
so rough on us today.

230
00:09:47,135 --> 00:09:48,536
No, these physical fitness guys

231
00:09:48,537 --> 00:09:49,604
all work the same way.

232
00:09:49,605 --> 00:09:50,938
They murder you the first day,

233
00:09:50,939 --> 00:09:51,939
then they ease off.

234
00:09:51,940 --> 00:09:52,940
Yeah.

235
00:09:52,941 --> 00:09:54,007
[TELEPHONE RINGS]

236
00:09:55,043 --> 00:09:56,143
Ah, Jeannie. Ah. Ah.

237
00:09:58,614 --> 00:10:00,281
Hello? Major Nelson
here.

238
00:10:00,282 --> 00:10:02,149
Oh.

239
00:10:02,150 --> 00:10:03,310
Yes, Commander Kiski.

240
00:10:04,553 --> 00:10:05,553
Yes, sir.

241
00:10:06,622 --> 00:10:09,890
Ye... All right.
All right.

242
00:10:09,891 --> 00:10:11,292
Well, what's wrong?

243
00:10:11,293 --> 00:10:13,561
We're to report to
Staging Area F,

244
00:10:13,562 --> 00:10:15,396
pick up our winter
field uniforms.

245
00:10:15,397 --> 00:10:17,465
Area F in our winter uniforms?
Are you kidding?

246
00:10:17,466 --> 00:10:18,466
It's 100 degrees there.

247
00:10:18,467 --> 00:10:20,200
Hundred and one.
Kiski checked.

248
00:10:20,201 --> 00:10:21,569
Master, please let me help you.

249
00:10:21,570 --> 00:10:22,936
No, I'll... I'll take
care of it.

250
00:10:22,937 --> 00:10:24,438
It's my responsibility.
Tsk.

251
00:10:24,439 --> 00:10:25,839
Yeah, It's not like in school,

252
00:10:25,840 --> 00:10:27,675
where your mother
writes you an excuse.

253
00:10:27,676 --> 00:10:28,776
Roge, giddyap.

254
00:10:30,812 --> 00:10:32,446
An excuse from mother?

255
00:10:33,615 --> 00:10:34,948
Mm.

256
00:10:42,591 --> 00:10:44,292
I don't care what Nelson says.

257
00:10:44,293 --> 00:10:46,394
He and Healey can't
drink the water.

258
00:10:46,395 --> 00:10:49,263
Now you tell those two softies
to get over here on the double.

259
00:10:49,264 --> 00:10:51,299
And make sure they zipper up
their overcoats.

260
00:10:51,300 --> 00:10:52,866
I'm through being a nice guy.

261
00:10:57,306 --> 00:10:58,422
Hello.

262
00:10:59,725 --> 00:11:02,026
What did...? How did
you get in here?

263
00:11:02,027 --> 00:11:04,395
Oh, I brought you a note
from Major Nelson's mother.

264
00:11:04,396 --> 00:11:06,397
A-and one from
Major Healey's too.

265
00:11:06,398 --> 00:11:09,533
You'll have to excuse them
from any more, uh, exercises.

266
00:11:09,534 --> 00:11:12,014
Notes from their mothers?

267
00:11:12,304 --> 00:11:13,404
What are you,

268
00:11:13,405 --> 00:11:15,707
some sort of weird
cocktail waitress?

269
00:11:15,708 --> 00:11:17,909
Oh. Please read
the notes.

270
00:11:17,910 --> 00:11:20,611
Oh. I get it.

271
00:11:20,612 --> 00:11:23,181
You're either a girlfriend
of Nelson or Healey's,

272
00:11:23,182 --> 00:11:25,649
and you're trying to come over
here and help them get out of

273
00:11:25,650 --> 00:11:26,951
some of those hard, nasty jobs.

274
00:11:26,952 --> 00:11:28,452
Oh, believe me,
I'm not doing that.

275
00:11:28,453 --> 00:11:29,754
Mm, yeah. I know.

276
00:11:29,755 --> 00:11:31,723
It's women like you
that love to smother guys.

277
00:11:31,724 --> 00:11:33,024
Protect 'em, keep 'em soft.

278
00:11:33,025 --> 00:11:34,525
Oh, I just want to see...

279
00:11:34,526 --> 00:11:35,659
I've seen dames like you.

280
00:11:35,660 --> 00:11:37,161
You ruin 'em with your cuddling.

281
00:11:37,162 --> 00:11:38,295
I know.

282
00:11:38,296 --> 00:11:40,798
My Aunt Effie
tried to do it to me. Hm.

283
00:11:40,799 --> 00:11:41,866
Every day, I remember,

284
00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:44,168
"Eat your cottage
cheese, Francis."

285
00:11:44,169 --> 00:11:46,137
"Drink your milkie,
Francis."

286
00:11:46,138 --> 00:11:48,973
"Don't forget to wear
your rubber hat, Francis."

287
00:11:48,974 --> 00:11:50,742
Egh-yuck.

288
00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:52,243
Your Aunt Effie sounds
very sweet.

289
00:11:52,244 --> 00:11:53,861
Sweet?!

290
00:11:53,862 --> 00:11:55,028
If I didn't get away from her,

291
00:11:55,029 --> 00:11:56,597
she would have made
a sissy out of me.

292
00:11:56,598 --> 00:11:58,298
But I'm not gonna let
your pals get away.

293
00:11:58,299 --> 00:11:59,834
Not till I make 'em
as hard as steel.

294
00:11:59,835 --> 00:12:00,985
I do not think your Aunt Effie

295
00:12:00,986 --> 00:12:03,121
would like the way
you treat them.

296
00:12:03,122 --> 00:12:04,722
Her? She'd have them
sitting under a tree

297
00:12:04,723 --> 00:12:06,874
eating blueberry pie.

298
00:12:06,875 --> 00:12:08,709
Oh, that is nice.

299
00:12:08,710 --> 00:12:11,012
Oh, yeah?
Well, you get...!

300
00:12:11,013 --> 00:12:12,913
[GIGGLES]

301
00:12:12,914 --> 00:12:17,001
Your Aunt Effie is
a much nicer person.

302
00:12:17,002 --> 00:12:18,852
Out of here, because
I don't really care.

303
00:12:18,853 --> 00:12:20,421
Major Healey and
Major Nelson, sir.

304
00:12:20,422 --> 00:12:22,557
Major Healey and Major Nelson?

305
00:12:24,492 --> 00:12:26,944
I told you not to ask
for water. He'll kill us.

306
00:12:26,945 --> 00:12:28,512
Attention!

307
00:12:28,513 --> 00:12:30,514
Okay, you guys.
Now, I'm...

308
00:12:30,515 --> 00:12:33,651
Oh, I'm...
I'm awfully sorry, boys.

309
00:12:33,652 --> 00:12:37,321
Forgive me. Oh, my goodness.
I'll have mercy on you.

310
00:12:37,322 --> 00:12:39,623
You shouldn't be dressed
in these hot outfits

311
00:12:39,624 --> 00:12:41,158
on a day like this.

312
00:12:41,159 --> 00:12:42,493
It's ridiculous.

313
00:12:42,494 --> 00:12:44,912
Take off those clothes.
Really, boys.

314
00:12:44,913 --> 00:12:46,798
I don't want to see you suffer.

315
00:12:46,799 --> 00:12:48,966
You should be able to
relax and enjoy,

316
00:12:48,967 --> 00:12:50,568
and be nice and cool.

317
00:12:50,569 --> 00:12:52,703
That's no way to dress
in hot weather.

318
00:12:52,704 --> 00:12:54,839
Here. Have a drink
of water there.

319
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:56,841
Don't drink it.
It's a trick.

320
00:12:56,842 --> 00:12:59,260
Hey, listen, fellas.
I have an idea.

321
00:12:59,261 --> 00:13:00,761
You ought to get into
some shorts

322
00:13:00,762 --> 00:13:02,563
and sit under a nice cool tree.

323
00:13:02,564 --> 00:13:03,815
[LAUGHS]

324
00:13:06,185 --> 00:13:08,820
I'll get you some pie.
Do you like blueberry pie?

325
00:13:08,821 --> 00:13:11,155
It's delicious with cold milk.

326
00:13:11,156 --> 00:13:12,890
You go ahead and rest here,

327
00:13:12,891 --> 00:13:14,925
and I'll go see about
the pie, okay, fellas?

328
00:13:14,926 --> 00:13:16,193
Ah.

329
00:13:16,194 --> 00:13:17,294
Drink, enjoy.

330
00:13:17,295 --> 00:13:19,735
You're marvelous.
Wonderful boys.

331
00:13:20,832 --> 00:13:22,900
It's so drab in here.

332
00:13:22,901 --> 00:13:25,503
You ought to have chintz
to brighten it up a little bit.

333
00:13:25,504 --> 00:13:28,272
Jeez, it would make it
so beautiful.

334
00:13:29,391 --> 00:13:31,892
Chintz? In a tent?

335
00:13:33,528 --> 00:13:34,795
Chintz?

336
00:13:37,049 --> 00:13:38,482
It's a plot.

337
00:13:38,483 --> 00:13:40,517
He's going to poison the pie.

338
00:13:40,518 --> 00:13:41,618
It's a trick.

339
00:13:41,619 --> 00:13:43,287
Why would he wanna
poison the pie?

340
00:13:43,288 --> 00:13:44,621
If it's not a trick,

341
00:13:44,622 --> 00:13:47,182
we're in the hands
of a raving maniac.

342
00:13:53,198 --> 00:13:54,881
Boys. Boys?

343
00:13:57,619 --> 00:13:59,753
Boys? Boys.

344
00:13:59,754 --> 00:14:01,488
Oh. There you are.

345
00:14:01,489 --> 00:14:02,656
There you are.

346
00:14:03,991 --> 00:14:06,893
Hurry up, boys.
It's naughty to be a slowpoke.

347
00:14:08,262 --> 00:14:09,763
What am I saying?

348
00:14:11,999 --> 00:14:14,167
Don't go with him.
He's trying to get us lost.

349
00:14:14,168 --> 00:14:15,502
Just like Hansel and Gretel.

350
00:14:15,503 --> 00:14:17,103
I know he's acting
kind of peculiar,

351
00:14:17,104 --> 00:14:19,424
but that pie was delicious.

352
00:14:19,507 --> 00:14:21,274
[LAUGHS] Oh.

353
00:14:21,275 --> 00:14:22,743
My, the air out here
is wonderful.

354
00:14:22,744 --> 00:14:23,944
Yeah.

355
00:14:23,945 --> 00:14:25,245
Are you comfortable, master?

356
00:14:25,246 --> 00:14:26,847
Yeah. Uh, listen, uh,
get out of here.

357
00:14:26,848 --> 00:14:28,349
Kiski's gonna be
back any minute.

358
00:14:28,350 --> 00:14:29,350
Yeah, with more pie.

359
00:14:29,351 --> 00:14:30,818
I couldn't eat another bite.

360
00:14:30,819 --> 00:14:33,554
Oh, I'm glad you two are
getting along so well with him.

361
00:14:33,555 --> 00:14:35,622
Well, he's not such
a bad guy once you know him.

362
00:14:35,623 --> 00:14:36,623
KISKI:
Major!

363
00:14:36,624 --> 00:14:37,991
Oh, come on, Jeannie.
Out, out.

364
00:14:37,992 --> 00:14:39,727
Oh. Yes, master.

365
00:14:39,728 --> 00:14:40,728
Have a nice day.

366
00:14:40,729 --> 00:14:41,862
Yeah...
Really, now...

367
00:14:41,863 --> 00:14:43,397
Now... Oh.

368
00:14:43,398 --> 00:14:44,398
Come on.
Major!

369
00:14:44,399 --> 00:14:45,432
[MUMBLES]

370
00:14:51,539 --> 00:14:53,940
Hey! There you are.
Yeah.

371
00:14:53,941 --> 00:14:55,141
Your easels are all set up.

372
00:14:55,142 --> 00:14:56,877
Our easels?
Our easels?

373
00:14:56,878 --> 00:14:59,613
Certainly.
On a glorious day like today,

374
00:14:59,614 --> 00:15:01,254
there's nothing like
a good paint.

375
00:15:04,419 --> 00:15:06,687
Good paint?

376
00:15:06,688 --> 00:15:09,307
Well, you go right ahead.
We... We'll be there.

377
00:15:09,308 --> 00:15:10,407
Well, uh, ahem,

378
00:15:10,408 --> 00:15:11,559
you set up the easels.

379
00:15:11,560 --> 00:15:13,210
Oh, easels. Yes.
Yes. Yes.

380
00:15:16,247 --> 00:15:18,782
I had a counselor like that
when I was a kid in summer camp.

381
00:15:18,783 --> 00:15:19,817
Eh... What happened?

382
00:15:19,818 --> 00:15:21,652
The camp nurse sent him
home early.

383
00:15:21,653 --> 00:15:23,837
KISKI:
Boys, painting time!

384
00:15:23,838 --> 00:15:24,838
Easy.
Take it easy.

385
00:15:37,468 --> 00:15:38,836
Where's Commander Kiski?

386
00:15:41,056 --> 00:15:42,339
Uh, he's on a, uh...

387
00:15:42,340 --> 00:15:43,540
nature hike, sir.

388
00:15:44,643 --> 00:15:45,976
I'll call him for you.

389
00:15:53,668 --> 00:15:55,135
[TELEPHONE RINGS]

390
00:15:56,838 --> 00:15:57,838
Hello.

391
00:15:57,839 --> 00:15:58,939
GENERAL:
<i>Kiski?</i>

392
00:15:58,940 --> 00:16:00,658
This is General Powlett.

393
00:16:00,659 --> 00:16:03,361
Oh, hello, General Powlett.
How are you, sir?

394
00:16:03,362 --> 00:16:04,445
<i>Lovely day, isn't it?</i>

395
00:16:04,446 --> 00:16:06,146
<i>Uh...</i>

396
00:16:06,147 --> 00:16:07,915
Excuse me a moment, general.

397
00:16:07,916 --> 00:16:09,416
Uh, Tony...
Yeah?

398
00:16:09,417 --> 00:16:11,418
Yours is very good...

399
00:16:11,419 --> 00:16:13,037
but your bunny's all wrong.

400
00:16:13,038 --> 00:16:14,455
<i>Your bunny should have</i>

401
00:16:14,456 --> 00:16:18,893
big, floppy ears and
a tiny, fluffy tail.

402
00:16:18,894 --> 00:16:20,961
It's an elm tree.
Oh, yeah.

403
00:16:20,962 --> 00:16:23,030
Heh. And a lovely
tree it is.

404
00:16:23,031 --> 00:16:25,182
Uh, Roger, yours is
very good too.

405
00:16:25,183 --> 00:16:28,285
<i>I love yours. I love your</i>
<i>purple and yellow sky.</i>

406
00:16:28,286 --> 00:16:29,386
<i>[LAUGHS]</i>

407
00:16:30,721 --> 00:16:31,755
<i>Very excellent.</i>

408
00:16:31,756 --> 00:16:32,940
Heh.

409
00:16:32,941 --> 00:16:34,642
Are you out of your mind?

410
00:16:34,643 --> 00:16:36,826
Floppy ears and fluffy tail?

411
00:16:37,896 --> 00:16:39,029
What did you do to Kiski?

412
00:16:40,399 --> 00:16:42,566
Well, all I did was take him
notes from your mothers

413
00:16:42,567 --> 00:16:44,268
to excuse you
from the exercises...

414
00:16:44,269 --> 00:16:45,786
I... I don't want to
hear anymore.

415
00:16:45,787 --> 00:16:47,938
Well, he did not even
read the notes.

416
00:16:47,939 --> 00:16:50,340
All he did was talk about
his sweet, little old Aunt Effie

417
00:16:50,341 --> 00:16:51,909
who used to make him
drink milk and...

418
00:16:51,910 --> 00:16:53,944
And baked him blueberry pies.
And...

419
00:16:53,945 --> 00:16:55,746
And you turned him
into his Aunt Effie?

420
00:16:55,747 --> 00:16:57,581
Well, I only wanted to...

421
00:16:57,582 --> 00:17:00,000
Yeah... Jeannie,
you shouldn't have interfered.

422
00:17:00,001 --> 00:17:01,034
You can't...

423
00:17:01,035 --> 00:17:02,536
I will not let him
work you so hard.

424
00:17:02,537 --> 00:17:04,205
But you can't...
Right back to...

425
00:17:04,206 --> 00:17:06,207
Hey, I didn't know
that Kiski had an Aunt Effie.

426
00:17:06,208 --> 00:17:07,374
I thought his only relative

427
00:17:07,375 --> 00:17:09,109
was the Creature from the
Black Lagoon.

428
00:17:09,110 --> 00:17:10,377
Oh, funny.
That's funny.

429
00:17:10,378 --> 00:17:13,180
Well, how about the monster
that stepped on Cincinnati?

430
00:17:13,181 --> 00:17:15,661
[CHUCKLES] Roger.

431
00:17:19,187 --> 00:17:22,189
All right, men, we're
nearing the drop zone.

432
00:17:22,190 --> 00:17:23,623
This will be a survival exercise

433
00:17:23,624 --> 00:17:25,592
under conditions of
maximum hazard.

434
00:17:25,593 --> 00:17:28,153
Commander Kiski, would you
like to brief your men?

435
00:17:29,514 --> 00:17:31,081
Please...

436
00:17:31,082 --> 00:17:32,149
be careful.

437
00:17:34,018 --> 00:17:35,419
For this exercise,

438
00:17:35,420 --> 00:17:37,940
we have simulated a drop
into enemy territory.

439
00:17:39,207 --> 00:17:41,575
The enemy has already
spotted this aircraft,

440
00:17:41,576 --> 00:17:44,311
and from the moment you land,
they will be in pursuit.

441
00:17:44,996 --> 00:17:47,798
Ohh! That's exciting.

442
00:17:47,799 --> 00:17:50,150
Under no circumstances

443
00:17:50,151 --> 00:17:52,252
will you permit yourselves
to be captured.

444
00:17:52,253 --> 00:17:54,138
Is that clear?
Yes, sir.

445
00:17:54,139 --> 00:17:55,055
Good luck, gentlemen.

446
00:17:55,056 --> 00:17:56,390
Ready, sir.

447
00:17:56,391 --> 00:17:59,026
All right.
Stand up. Hook up.

448
00:17:59,027 --> 00:18:00,060
Ah.

449
00:18:02,781 --> 00:18:03,814
KISKI:
Roger.

450
00:18:03,815 --> 00:18:05,249
Button up your collar.

451
00:18:05,250 --> 00:18:06,850
It's drafty outside.

452
00:18:09,287 --> 00:18:10,738
Tony, are your
chute straps tight?

453
00:18:10,739 --> 00:18:13,240
And for goodness' sake,
please, stand up straight.

454
00:18:14,375 --> 00:18:16,076
[SENSOR BUZZES] Go!

455
00:18:16,077 --> 00:18:17,545
Well, come on, Aunt Effie.

456
00:18:17,546 --> 00:18:19,246
Here we go.
Jump.

457
00:18:19,247 --> 00:18:20,247
[YELLS]

458
00:18:25,504 --> 00:18:27,337
Aunt Effie?

459
00:18:27,338 --> 00:18:29,173
He called him Aunt Effie.

460
00:18:29,174 --> 00:18:30,507
Oh. Yes, sir.

461
00:18:30,508 --> 00:18:32,843
It's a term we use
when we jump out of a plane.

462
00:18:32,844 --> 00:18:34,344
Uh, like "Geronimo."

463
00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:37,281
Aunt Effie!

464
00:18:39,417 --> 00:18:40,617
Aunt Effie?

465
00:18:52,630 --> 00:18:53,730
Any sign of Kiski?

466
00:18:57,068 --> 00:18:58,468
Yes.

467
00:19:02,073 --> 00:19:04,308
He parachuted right in
the middle of the enemy camp.

468
00:19:04,309 --> 00:19:05,909
You're kidding.
Yeah.

469
00:19:05,910 --> 00:19:07,610
And we're on the wrong side
of the river.

470
00:19:07,611 --> 00:19:09,179
You mean we're in
enemy territory?

471
00:19:09,180 --> 00:19:10,948
Yeah!

472
00:19:10,949 --> 00:19:13,217
Jeannie!
Jeannie!

473
00:19:13,218 --> 00:19:14,284
Hey.

474
00:19:14,285 --> 00:19:17,187
[LAUGHS] Did someone call?

475
00:19:17,755 --> 00:19:19,689
Oh. Jeannie.

476
00:19:19,690 --> 00:19:21,725
Here. There's...

477
00:19:21,726 --> 00:19:24,261
Jeannie, we are in
enemy territory.

478
00:19:24,262 --> 00:19:25,429
They've got Kiski.

479
00:19:25,430 --> 00:19:26,663
Do you have any idea what

480
00:19:26,664 --> 00:19:28,599
they're gonna do to him at...
At headquarters

481
00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:30,300
if he arrives
in his condition, huh?

482
00:19:30,301 --> 00:19:33,103
Anyway, this whole area's
surrounded by enemy patrols.

483
00:19:33,104 --> 00:19:34,504
Get us out of here, quick. Yeah.

484
00:19:34,505 --> 00:19:36,385
Well, I thought you'd never ask.

485
00:19:41,462 --> 00:19:42,596
They're gone.

486
00:19:44,932 --> 00:19:46,833
Well, I had them spotted
for a moment, sir,

487
00:19:46,834 --> 00:19:48,954
but they seem to
have disappeared.

488
00:19:49,437 --> 00:19:50,970
Well I don't know, sir.

489
00:19:50,971 --> 00:19:53,407
They were there just a moment
ago but, well, they're gone.

490
00:19:59,931 --> 00:20:01,081
- Don't, sir.
- I...

491
00:20:03,868 --> 00:20:05,436
TONY: We're back on the plane.

492
00:20:05,437 --> 00:20:07,971
Yes. Now you can jump
on the right side of the river.

493
00:20:07,972 --> 00:20:09,939
No. Jeannie,
don't you understand?

494
00:20:09,940 --> 00:20:11,775
We've got to rescue Kiski.

495
00:20:11,776 --> 00:20:13,577
We've got to get
to the other side of the...

496
00:20:13,578 --> 00:20:15,245
Ahh!

497
00:20:15,246 --> 00:20:16,246
Come on, Major Healey.

498
00:20:16,247 --> 00:20:17,281
Hey, wait a minute.

499
00:20:17,282 --> 00:20:18,699
You haven't got a parachute.

500
00:20:18,700 --> 00:20:20,851
Yeah.
Yes. Isn't that exciting?

501
00:20:20,852 --> 00:20:22,086
Aunt Effie!

502
00:20:24,805 --> 00:20:26,285
[MOUTHS] Aunt Effie.

503
00:20:32,346 --> 00:20:33,346
You sure?

504
00:20:36,567 --> 00:20:38,335
Okay.

505
00:20:38,336 --> 00:20:40,003
All right.

506
00:20:40,004 --> 00:20:41,671
Sentry's spotted
two more parachutes

507
00:20:41,672 --> 00:20:43,140
on this side of the river.

508
00:20:43,141 --> 00:20:44,374
Uh, I'll cover this sector.

509
00:20:44,375 --> 00:20:46,743
You blindfold the prisoner.
Take him to headquarters.

510
00:20:46,744 --> 00:20:48,878
Untie me. I'll scratch
your eyes out!

511
00:20:48,879 --> 00:20:49,879
Move.

512
00:20:59,324 --> 00:21:00,507
The prisoner got away, sir.

513
00:21:01,726 --> 00:21:03,846
Hop in.
We'll catch him.

514
00:21:16,274 --> 00:21:18,275
They've been reported
where, general?

515
00:21:18,276 --> 00:21:20,110
Right there.

516
00:21:20,111 --> 00:21:22,579
But that's 30 miles
from the drop area.

517
00:21:22,580 --> 00:21:23,913
It isn't possible.

518
00:21:23,914 --> 00:21:25,782
Don't ask me
to explain it, doctor,

519
00:21:25,783 --> 00:21:28,585
but I know that
they helped Kiski escape,

520
00:21:28,586 --> 00:21:31,021
and somehow commandeered
an enemy vehicle.

521
00:21:31,022 --> 00:21:33,240
Blue Squadron has got 'em
trapped in Box Canyon.

522
00:21:34,042 --> 00:21:35,042
[TELEPHONE RINGS]

523
00:21:37,395 --> 00:21:38,395
General Powlett.

524
00:21:40,898 --> 00:21:42,382
What?

525
00:21:42,383 --> 00:21:43,917
Well, they've got to be there.

526
00:21:43,918 --> 00:21:45,051
Are you sure?

527
00:21:47,021 --> 00:21:48,255
They got out.

528
00:21:48,256 --> 00:21:50,641
Now, how did Kiski do that?

529
00:21:50,642 --> 00:21:53,043
But you said there was
no way out, sir.

530
00:21:53,044 --> 00:21:57,030
There was one way.
Straight up.

531
00:22:06,441 --> 00:22:07,741
Thanks for the ride, Jeannie.

532
00:22:07,742 --> 00:22:09,209
Oh, You are
very welcome, master.

533
00:22:09,210 --> 00:22:10,477
Wait a minute, wait a minute.

534
00:22:10,478 --> 00:22:12,446
What are we gonna do
with our fearless leader?

535
00:22:12,447 --> 00:22:14,581
Untie me, you rotten
boys. Untie me.

536
00:22:14,582 --> 00:22:15,715
Blink him back to normal.

537
00:22:15,716 --> 00:22:17,417
Oh, but master, he is so mean.

538
00:22:17,418 --> 00:22:19,319
Yeah. Well,
I know that,

539
00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:20,920
but I-it's
his career, Jeannie.

540
00:22:20,921 --> 00:22:22,456
Go on. And you
blink out of here too.

541
00:22:22,457 --> 00:22:23,624
Oh, no, master.
Go on.

542
00:22:23,625 --> 00:22:24,625
I'm not kidding.

543
00:22:24,626 --> 00:22:26,467
You never let me have any fun.

544
00:22:27,362 --> 00:22:28,995
Jeannie?
[SCREAMS]

545
00:22:28,996 --> 00:22:31,231
Ah!
[SCREAMS]

546
00:22:31,232 --> 00:22:32,432
Hold on.
You untie him.

547
00:22:32,433 --> 00:22:34,434
Take off his blindfold,
and I'll take this off.

548
00:22:34,435 --> 00:22:35,669
[SCREAMS]

549
00:22:35,670 --> 00:22:36,903
Whoa, maybe we better just

550
00:22:36,904 --> 00:22:38,088
take off the blindfold.

551
00:22:38,089 --> 00:22:40,056
Wait a minute.

552
00:22:40,057 --> 00:22:42,659
You meatheaded, goldbricking,
jet jockeys!

553
00:22:43,561 --> 00:22:44,645
I'm gonna break you...

554
00:22:44,646 --> 00:22:46,847
Gee, sir. Uh, sir.
Can you walk?

555
00:22:46,848 --> 00:22:48,182
Sure, I can walk!
What are you?

556
00:22:48,183 --> 00:22:50,951
You got us through that survival
mission without a scratch.

557
00:22:50,952 --> 00:22:52,068
Help him, Roger.
He's weak.

558
00:22:52,069 --> 00:22:54,488
Who's weak?
I'll... The survival mission?

559
00:22:54,489 --> 00:22:56,372
Yeah, you were an inspiration
to both of us.

560
00:22:56,373 --> 00:22:57,357
Don't you remember, sir?

561
00:22:57,358 --> 00:22:58,926
Well, of course
he doesn't remember.

562
00:22:58,927 --> 00:23:01,245
He struck his head on that rock,
trying to save your life.

563
00:23:01,246 --> 00:23:03,163
I did? On the survival
course?

564
00:23:03,164 --> 00:23:04,631
Steady.
Whoa. Take it easy.

565
00:23:04,632 --> 00:23:06,800
I'm perfectly all right.
I'm perfectly all right.

566
00:23:06,801 --> 00:23:08,201
All right.
Just leave me alone.

567
00:23:08,202 --> 00:23:09,369
Whoa.
Le... Let me down.

568
00:23:09,370 --> 00:23:11,070
You and Healey?
On the survival course?

569
00:23:11,071 --> 00:23:12,071
I did?

570
00:23:12,072 --> 00:23:13,239
We'll tell you all about it

571
00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:15,108
before General Powlett
gets here.

572
00:23:15,109 --> 00:23:17,343
Okay. Okay. But just...
Just help me.

573
00:23:17,344 --> 00:23:18,512
I... I don't
feel too good.

574
00:23:18,513 --> 00:23:21,247
I don't know how you did it.

575
00:23:21,248 --> 00:23:23,683
Your act is gonna
go down in history

576
00:23:23,684 --> 00:23:25,685
as one of
the most heroic acts ever.

577
00:23:33,528 --> 00:23:36,630
And so, gentlemen,
because of your miraculous,

578
00:23:36,631 --> 00:23:39,499
and in my view,
highly suspicious success,

579
00:23:39,500 --> 00:23:40,834
headquarters has decided to

580
00:23:40,835 --> 00:23:42,703
abandon Commander Kiski's
program.

581
00:23:42,704 --> 00:23:43,704
Abandon it, sir?

582
00:23:43,705 --> 00:23:45,071
Well, if it were such a success,

583
00:23:45,072 --> 00:23:46,673
why... Why do they want to
abandon it?

584
00:23:46,674 --> 00:23:48,475
Because we feel that
you had already been

585
00:23:48,476 --> 00:23:50,510
superbly conditioned
as astronauts.

586
00:23:50,511 --> 00:23:52,178
Ah. N-no more
punishment.

587
00:23:52,179 --> 00:23:54,080
Uh, from now on,
it's, uh, easy living, huh?

588
00:23:54,081 --> 00:23:56,099
However, headquarters feels
that it's vital

589
00:23:56,100 --> 00:23:57,701
to maintain your fine
conditioning.

590
00:23:57,702 --> 00:23:58,936
And to that end,

591
00:23:58,937 --> 00:24:01,338
they have assigned
a permanent physical instructor.

592
00:24:06,677 --> 00:24:10,647
You soft-bellied
lounge lizards.

593
00:24:10,648 --> 00:24:14,084
This is where I remove
the fat from your frame.

594
00:24:14,085 --> 00:24:16,053
Right.
Put that down!

595
00:24:16,054 --> 00:24:17,054
Now get moving.

596
00:24:17,055 --> 00:24:18,421
What are you standing here for?

597
00:24:18,422 --> 00:24:19,422
[BLOWS WHISTLE]

598
00:24:19,423 --> 00:24:21,225
Hut two, hut two, hut two.

599
00:24:22,260 --> 00:24:24,394
Marshmallows.
Ho-ho.

600
00:24:24,395 --> 00:24:25,729
You guys, move it!

601
00:24:25,730 --> 00:24:26,830
[BLOWS WHISTLE]

602
00:24:31,736 --> 00:24:35,088
[?]

603
00:24:35,138 --> 00:24:39,688
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